In a tale as old as digital news feeds, America’s favorite outspoken podcaster and conservative commentator, Tucker Carlson, seems to have ruffled some feathers with his latest scoop: President Trump is allegedly gearing up to announce a war with Venezuela. Now, for those of you keeping track at home, presidents generally deliver national addresses not just to tease the fall line-up of foreign conflicts but for matters a tad more, let’s say, impactful.

According to Carlson’s well-placed sources, the big 9 p.m. announcement is supposed to make headlines bigger than the Superbowl, with whispers of an impending conflict due to Venezuela’s alleged mischievous meddling in everything from election rigging to oil tanker tomfoolery. Of course, any involvement with elections conjures up images typically reserved for spy movie plotlines, which is ironic considering America, the nation known for spreading democracy faster than peanut butter on bread, is now accusing someone else of the same.

Adding fuel to the speculation, there’s talk about Trump chilling with a few well-placed military figures, giving just the right backdrop for media narratives about increased hostilities. Between the oil tanker antics and the secret congressional briefings, you might think Trump was planning to host a reality TV show about modern warfare, with plot twists plucked right from the headlines. Forget “The Apprentice”; this could be “The Commander.”

However, despite all the rumbles of war drums, there’s also chatter of Trump boasting about his policy successes and planning a victory lap on domestic achievements. Lower gas prices and inflation tame enough to write home about seem to be on tonight’s bingo card, with promises of more to come. If Trump goes for this narrative, the only warfare we’ll witness might be the one against leftover election-season hysteria.

Then there’s Carlson’s curious situation. With his keen sense of taking a stand, even against his favorites, he’s setting the stage for a rematch of opinions reminiscent of reality TV’s best rivalry episodes. While Tucker weighs his words to avoid a clash of titans with Trump, we’re left wondering if this is a strategy of distraction or something far more substantial. At the end of the day, whether this is Trump teasing us with policy genius or playing fiddle-master to the media pundit orchestra, only time will tell.

So, as the curtain rises for tonight’s show, keep your snacks ready and remote in hand. Whether it’s a declaration of war or just another episode in the ongoing political drama, viewers better brace for action, anticipation, and perhaps another round of “he said, she said” in American politics.