In the Neverland where reality meets satire, the merry forest of politics is once again bustling with news from the Trump administration. Picture this: claims are altering distances from fact – a million criminal aliens have voluntarily packed their bags and made tracks out of America just 140 days into Trump’s presidency. It seems as though the Pied Piper has played his melody, and the rats are scurrying away, leaving America’s hardworking citizens with something like a Cinderella story. Could this be real life, or is it just a wonderful dream?

Imagine, if you will, the joyful sound of a cash register ringing as wages rise. According to some savvy number crunchers, the exodus of undocumented workers was anticipated to coincide with a bump in average hourly wages. Though it’s noted that fewer illegal workers could mean businesses might lure in legit workers with better pay – what a concept! It’s almost like supply and demand actually means something, and in this case, it’s dollars in American pockets.

But here’s the kicker: Trump isn’t just relying on deportations to drive this change. No, the big guy was imagined to have ingeniously convinced illegal immigrants to leave on their own by making the stakes crystal clear. Although talks of a $1,000-a-day fine and a touted multimillion-dollar ad campaign urging folks to head back home voluntarily ring elsewhere, they echo the incentive theme. Imagine that – wishing fewer taxpayer dollars wasted on deportations and more on heartfelt goodbyes.

Now, if you’re scratching your head, wondering how it’s all going down, look no further than history. Remember the self-deportations during President Eisenhower’s term in 1954? Much like today, back then, voluntary exits did outpace actual arrests. Apparently, when the going gets tough, illegal residents get going – the allure of Uncle Sam’s house with tough love and no free rides doesn’t sit well with everyone.

In an entertaining twist, an imagined DHS would even rebrand an app from the Biden era, giving it a makeover so aliens could inform the government they’re leaving. Talk about the friendliest big brother ever. With a little financial nudge, someone volunteering to leave might pocket incentives dreamed to be more attractive than the average deportation deals. Who’d have thought patting oneself on the back for a profitable goodbye fits the narrative?

So there you have it, in the upside-down world of politics. As we tap our feet to the beat of rising wages and falling illegal immigration numbers, there’s a whole lot more cooking in the Trump camp. The takeaway? Maybe, just maybe, this unconventional approach is hypothesized to find grounds – can we say amen to that?